Aug 614 min read

Mizzy's Birthday Bash

The Adventures of Mizzy Bender

July 18-21, 2024

Setting the Stage

Buckle up, this will be a long one because it's my birthdayyyyyyyyyyyyy and we've got things going on! We'll be recapping the beach, talking my actual birthday and then it's travel weekend for my birthday bash in Rhode Island. So that's 4.5 days of shenanigans to talk about.

It is currently 8:39am on my birthday (Thursday, 7/18) and I'm a bit hung over in my bed while Spencer sleeps next to me. I just made my first cup of coffee and smoked after being awake for about an hour. We fell asleep on the couch last night, maybe around 2:30-3am. My freaking alarm clock was on for 6:30am. Ugh. I know Spencer turned it off and went into bed. In situations like this, he would never wake me up at that hour (anything past like 4am) because he knows I wont fall back asleep. So this morning, I was kind of in between awake and sleeping, so I just snuggled my pup a little more and fell back asleep for an hour. With all that being said, I'm still trying to get my wits about me. I definitely know a nap is in my future.

My brain is already on warp speed. I've been on social media way sooner than I anticipated this morning. You see, I have a terrible habit of waking up and immediately scrolling my social media to see what's up. I like to see how many boutique orders I have to accomplish, how many downloads the podcast received, event RSVPs and other misc. things. It helps me think through my flow for the day. Especially if i have a podcast recording or SDC Live in the afternoon. So, today was no different. I was going to check things out, then maybe watch silly reels on Instagram for a while. However, I was so overwhelmed by all the birthday wishes that were already coming through, I had to start replying. I really try and answer every comment. If you took the time to write me, I want to take the time to write you!

I want you to know how much my heart smiled reading all the comments! It has been heartwarming on so many levels. I am so appreciative of all the love and support. The world truly is a beautiful place and I am so fortunate to be living my best life with all of you in it. Thank you for always being so wonderful.

The Beach

Wednesdays have become a staple summer night out for the last 3 years. A DJ that Spencer really enjoys opened residency at one of our beaches and has been a hit ever since. So, just about every Wednesday we drive an hour there and an hour home so we can party in between. We'll, the weather has been a bit gross lately so there's always a percentage of storms in the forecast. We've ditched the beach a few nights because of it and end up missing out because the storm never comes. So on Wednesday, we were really debating what to do. For me, I feel bad for Spencer. He's the one that has to drive. I didn't want to say yes, let's go because I want to celebrate my birthday and then it rain. I would feel selfish. So we kept talking about it and talking about it and finally, we said Fuck it, let's do it. We both took off of work Thursday and Friday so it really didn't matter what we got into.

I went in and got dressed into the cute one piece romper I purchased for the night, put a little make up on, made my vodka water drink, with a second one to go and was ready in 15 minutes.

The drive went pretty quick. Before you knew it, we were at the beach ready to party ... way later than usual too. We got there a bit after 830pm. Usually we're there at like 7. Truthfully, i think 7 is too early. I kind of liked the later arrival. But that makes it difficult for Spencer to have some drinks. So it's a bit of a catch 22. So we usually just walk around the beach, smoke, refill our drinks. We kind of just dilly dally around until it really starts to pick up. Any ways, as soon as we were walking up, the friends we were meeting also were. It was perfect timing.

The weather was absolutely gross! It was so humid your fingers were shriveling. It was awful. It was also a bit windy outside of the bar area. Which then made you cold from being wet from the humidity. At some point all of that balanced out and shifted dark skies with insane lightening. We got some great shots from the beach. It was beautiful. We were also prepared for rain and decided to ride out whatever was coming our way. I am so glad we did because we had the time of our lives. It rained the last hour of the night. It was one of those summer rains where you really didn't care and just embraced it for all it was. That night was the best way to launch into my birthday. Metaphorically it all felt so empowering. I knew I was exactly where I was meant to be that night and in life in general.

Oddly, at 11:50pm they abruptly pulled the music and shut it down. So, at midnight it was just Spencer and I in the car and he sang me happy birthday. He's the most sweetest, most thoughtful, most loving man. The absolute best.

Upon arrival home it was birthday booty time and boy oh boy did that guy rocked my world. I loved every second of it.

The best 3 hours into a birthday anyone could ask for!

The Birthday Day

It was a super chill day. Since we had a slow morning, we ordered egg wraps and had breakfast in our fire pit in front of the waterfall watching the birds and butterflies. It was so peaceful and calming. I absolutely love that space in out yard. The rocks alone make me feel energized. The whole composition sooths my soul. So to spend the morning like that was perfect.

The plan was to venture to have afternoon crepes. I haven't had one in forever and thought that would be such a tasty treat. So we decided to adventure around while heading to and from crepes. I was so dang disappointed! Upon arrival we saw that it is now a bagel place. That's such crap!

We went home and I napped before having dinner with Spencer's parents. Everyone gets to choose their birthday meal and cake. I chose salmon and strawberry short cake. Both were absolutely delicious. I normally choose pasta, but, I'm really trying to stay on track and pasta doesn't do anything good for me. Except regret that I ate it. Lol.

I'm super excited because they gave me an adventurous gift! It's an Alice in Wonderland themed event through a botanical garden. It sounds like a unique experience that we'll have a ton of fun going to. Spencer's mom is already thinking through her themed outfit. ..... did you catch that? His mom is looking for her themed outfit. Lol. She cracks me up. We went to a Rocky Horror show once and she had the best outfit created for the night. I can't wait to see what she comes up with for this. We do have a lot of time to figure it out because it's not until September. But at least I know we have something super fun happening in a few months.

As a side note, we are also going to The Little Miss Nasty show. We don't have the date picked yet, but that will be fun too. Well have a group post created for those that want to join.

Ok, back to birthday stuff ...

So that's how the birthday went. Super chill and very low key. It was wonderful. I needed to be zen because I'm bringing out wild Mizzy for the weekend. It's my birthday party and I'm going to live it up!

Let the Travel Adventure Begin

Its 7:13am and it is travel day! Yahoooooooooooo

Were headed in earlier than usual, but later than I wanted. Unfortunately, we waited a bit too long to book our ferry, so we're on a 1:30pm out. We're headed in so our core little group can spend some quality birthday time together. I'm super excited because some of our friends are traveling with us, meeting at the ferry. We always have the silliest time together, so I'm really looking forward to it. I know it's going to be nothing but belly laughter and huge smiles this entire weekend.

As I sit here in the hot tub this morning, thinking about the weekend to come, I feel cool, calm and collected. Tomorrow is a big day. We are producing a completely new event. We've never hosted a foam party before. I've attended one during my lifestyle journey and people seemed to love it so I'm sure that will be just the same here. The foam party changes the event setup completely. I believe we're turning the entire inside into play space with the outside being the party space. I'm not positive so you'll have to stay tuned.

In a short while I'll start getting my self in order. I still have to pack. I'm not certain on what I'm wearing tomorrow so I have to bring like 95 things. All of which are different styles depending on what mood I'm in. Some go with the theme, some do not. So we'll have to see where I end up.

That's it for now! Next time I write will most likely be the car ride to the hotel tonight. That will be after traveling and hanging.

That Didn't Go As Expected

Well, it's currently Tuesday, July 30th and I have procrastinated enough! It's time to get back to writing.

Let's rewind a bit, filling in the blanks.

We honestly had the best time on the Friday before the party. It was a low key day at Marriedwithbenefits317 house. All the besties in one spot! You can not hate that at all. The sun was shining, the pool & hot tub were open for business and the drinks were flowing. Its what you would imagine a beautiful summer day to be like.

We took a small adventure to dinner, which turned out to be a lovely night even though Spencer was pouting because he wanted to stay in the summer sun back at the house. Lol. He eventually adapted to the new outdoor scene and dropped the tude! (I love you bubby)

The restaurant was such a cute place. The space was really welcoming. It had an ice cream truck with some seating and Cornhole. Eventually Spencer and Jim made their way over and played a round. It seems to be a pretty popular game these days.

Dinner was delicious. I ordered a beet salad. One of my most ordered menu items. It has all the good stuff... mixed greens, walnuts, crasins, feta or goat cheese and I always get the dressing on the side. Sometimes I'll order steak or chicken to balance it out.

For dessert I got a cup of ice cream. One scoop was dark chocolate the other was peanut butter fluff n nutter.... OMG is all I can say. It was absolutely delicious!

Eventually we made it back to the house, where more drinks flowed and the laughter became uncontrollable. By the time night came, we were either in the hot tub or down by the fire. Each location brought it's own kind of joy and absolute silliness. The memories will live on! I have a ton of videos I'll be posting to my social media over the next few weeks. Every time I watch them I just laugh and laugh and laugh. I record the most ridiculous things. Most of the time I forget what I've captured so I laugh even harder when I see the real funny stuff.

Around 9-930pm we decided to head to the hotel bringing an end to the night before the big day. It kind of felt like an abrupt leave actually. But, we were about 30 minutes away, so we really did have to get a move on.

Welcome to the Saturday Morning

It was another typical morning of Mizzy waking up before everyone, so I slipped on some clothes, grabbed a joint and headed down for coffee and to smoke. I really don't mind starting the day in this way. I think taking some time for myself, easing into the day independently works well for me. While at home, I'm awake for at least two hours before Spencer wakes up. So I'm used to cruising along, doing my own thing.

This particular morning was far better than any others! You see, as I was heading back up to my room, the elevator doors opened to two amazing humans who traveled just about 10 hours+ for the event. OMG! This warmed my heart so much! So instead of heading back to my room, I spent quality time with them over breakfast. It was so wonderful. I'm so thankful to the universe for setting that up because it's really hard to connect at the events. I'm usually bouncing all over the place, in my own world spending a few minutes with each person. Add in alcohol and Marijuana and forget it! It's just silly. Having that time together was priceless.

Swingers Party Setup Time

We made it to the club for about 10:30am to begin Setup. This was going to be way different than anything we've ever done as it was a foam party with dunk tank. A fabulous way to spend a summer day!

The DJ, foam pit and dunk tank were all setup outside making it the main area for the evening. The inside middle bar where the play rooms usually are actually became the running bar for the night. The inside where the party usually is was setup as the play space. It looked freaking amazing! Of course it did! Spencer's eye for design is like no other. He is a master in his trade of event setups/presentation.

We have such an unbelievable team. We work so well together and have the best time while doing it. You'll hear me say it a million times, but these are the moments I love the most.

This particular setup was extra special because one of the team members went above and beyond for birthday lunch. He brought in his BBQ and cooked us up a delicious Greek style lunch. Once I saw what was happening, I was blown away. Everyone really enjoyed that meal, the efforts and the human who created it. These are the moments when I realize we are and have created something uniquely special. The bond runs deep between us all. I appreciate that the most.

Around 4pm setup came to an end with the team heading back to the hotel to rest. Having that alone time is critical during event weekends. After spending all morning with people and having to party all night, I need that time and im not afraid to voice it any more. As usual, Spencer stayed back at the venue so he could put his final touches on things. He didn't make it back until about 6-7pm. Something went wrong with the foam machine so they needed to do alot of trouble shooting before the event. Thankfully, the company came and replaced the machine at the last minute. Gosh ... that really would have been a nightmare. I'm so glad it all worked out.

While Spencer was still at setup, our single guy arrived. He and I were just chillin in the room until it was time to start getting ready. I think it's important to spend solo time together. It helps create a better bond, ya know? Which in the end, creates a more explosive situation when intimate. I'm sure this doesn't work for everyone, but it's perfect for me.

Eventually Spencer made it back to the room just in time to start getting ready for the event. Although I was frustrated with him at the time for not communicating with me, I was happy he took some time for himself down at the hotel pool for a few minutes upon his return. I know he was looking forward to feeling the cool water after a ball busting hot day. I just get worried when we aren't in our normal location and I haven't heard from him.

In the end, we were all ready to party. That's all that matters.

It's Time for the Swingers to Gather!

I really didn't know what to expect of the night since it was going to be so different from what we normally do and because we were celebrating my birthday. I was excited, nervous and overwhelmed. I knew I would absolutely have to people that night. And I sure did people! I feel like I talked to hundreds of humans. It was pretty remarkable actually. So many came near and far just to be there for me. I couldn't believe it. The conversations really made my night, leaving birthday memories for a lifetime.

As I mentioned above, the night really came to life with the uniquely setup spaces. Its completely different seeing the venue setup during the day vs the night when all the lighting is in full effect. Since I leave before Spencer finalizes everything, Its always a surprise to see how it all comes together.

The outdoor party spot where the DJ and dance pole were setup was under a huge white tent that provided enough room for seating, dancing and mingling.

The dunk tank and foam pit had their own section right behind the entry tent. This space was packed most of the night. I have to say, Jim took his dunk tank job seriously and really smacked talked the guests. It was great. He went down quite a few times and the crowd laughed and cheered. I'm proud to say that I nailed it on the first try. It was exhilarating! Lmao.

The foam pit was built to be a semi enclosed tent to contain the bubbles but there was plenty of room for many party goers to dance, bang, take pictures and who knows what else. Everyone really did love it. The amount of laughter and smiles I saw that night while people were tackling the foam was one of the highlights of my night.

Next, you migrated inside to the middle bar to get your drinks. This bar is never used; but I really loved having it open in between both spaces. This allowed us to turn the entire inside of the club into play space. The design and lighting was completely on point. Absolutely beautiful in my opinion. We used almost the whole venue inside and out. On a hot summer day, it was the best setup to keep things flowing. I'm really proud of the team all the work they put into the day.

I can positively say I partied my ass off. I danced, I drank, I smoked, I got semi naked and had an absolute blast.

Sunday Chill Day

Sunday was a much needed chill day. Out of the sake of not wanting to really think about it and write it, I did leave some information out of the birthday recap above. You can tune in here to get the details.

If you took a moment to listen, you'll see things ended in a very hectic way Saturday night. The adrenaline running through all of us really helped when breaking down at 2:30am. Since we had all of our lighting and sound equipment outside, we had to breakdown before leaving. Whether we wanted to or not, I personally believe the intensity of the night helped us breakdown in lightening speed. We were back to our hotel around 315am-ish with no booty in sight. It was straight to bed so we can all try and regroup. Which was so disappointing truthfully. We had our single guy with us and I was totally looking forward to ending the night with the guys. I guess that's why we say to never get too far ahead of yourself when it comes to playing because anything could happen at any moment.

Sunday morning we were back at the club around 10am to complete the inside breakdown and the few miscellaneous items outside. It took us maybe 30 minutes altogether which was awesome because we really needed a break. We needed time to decompress.

Since we finished so early and our ferry wasn't until 5pm, we went to Marriedwithbenefits317 house to chill the afternoon away in the sun in a very low key way. Even that didn't go as expected. I feel like most of us left that weekend in such an unsettling, unfinished place.

I was ready to be at home, in my own bed, snuggling my pup, eating my chocolate bar.